The Wilderness is something which few of us have ever encountered. Yet the Wilderness is a critical and important starting point in the story of Jesus as he moved from his construction business into a traveling, itinerant ministry and as he moved from waiting and preparing to moving forward and doing.

It was in the Wilderness that John the baptizer appeared in anticipation of Jesus’ arrival. (Matthew 3: 1-3) And after Jesus had arrived and been baptized there, it was on to yet another Wilderness that Jesus was led for spiritual nurturing and maturing. (Matthew 4:1) So, according to these two citations, the Wilderness is conducive to discovering, knowing, and learning to follow God better.

Most people would say the opposite. We like padded pews, the coffee on, and the thermostat set at a perfect 72 degrees, with no drafts! It even becomes possible, after so much such pampering, to mistake familiarity and comfort themselves for God. And if I am controlling my environment, if I have been able to successfully tame my environment, and remove all impediments to my personal safety from my environment, then what does that make me? I become kind of my own God in that case: God(me) and God (the pleasant and harmless environment)) and God (the status quo).

A god in three parts, blessed (perverse) trinity!

Thus, the need for Wilderness. The unpredictability of that which is wild reminds us that we are not in ultimate control- not at all. The real world in which humans live does, in fact, have sharp edges: tsunamis, tornados, and tooth decay among many others. The Wilderness doesn’t merely remind us that we are one part of a much larger and complicatedly inter-related scenario, it forces us to act within that scenario, or die. The Wilderness, in short, gives us many (infinitely many more) opportunities to discover God and God’s Continuing Creation, and our part in that Continuance, than any thermostat ever will.

Behind the noise of the familiar, even beyond the endless noise of our yapping egos, there is the voice of He/She/That Which will whisper in our ears, and in our hearts, “Beloved..”

The lectionary for Lent,  and all Lenten devotionals I have ever seen,  follow Jesus from his baptism at the River Jordan all the way to the cross. It a journey, a road..ok? And we’re going on the road (again) with Jesus, so let’s  let Willy sing us into the mood:

“On the road again

Goin’ places that I’ve never been

Seein’ things that I may never see again

And I can’t wait to get on the road again..”

I’ll walk along the edge of the road, listening for and watching Jesus scripturally, while I look for junk in the ditch curiously. Jesus looked for junk in the ditch, too, and found it- because he was looking for it! “Junk” in religious law at the time of Jesus included human junk, unclean and not-to be-touched! Jesus found, and spoke about, and DID SOMETHING ABOUT junk that others didn’t want to see, or chose to step around- like a bloody man in the ditch. Or a woman who the men in town could tsk tsk tsk their pointy- nosed morality over, before they picked up stones to smash her skull in- so that she would know they were serious! Or junk like the crazy man out by the reservoir who lived with pigs.

“Goin places that I’ve never been..”

The more I walk behind and just off to the side of Jesus, and the older I get, the less time I want to spend being polite, or nice, or doctrinally protected by layers and layers of cushy meaninglessness. I might embarrass myself, or you- sorry! But I promise to do my best to talk/write about Jesus, the 1st century rabbi, who went sideways across the grain of the status quo, and showed us, if we have the courage to look, how to love. How to survive. And- most importantly- how to do those two things on behalf of others.  So I promise not to embarrass Jesus. But if I do, I figure forgiveness will be forthcoming.

“Seein’ things that I may never see again..”

When Jesus said, “blessed are the poor in spirit” he was talking about that drunk who just came into her first AA meeting ever, smelling of Pabst Blue Ribbon and vomit, and cried “Help me!” before passing out. You know that, yes? And he was talking about that young man who escaped from a years-long story of abuse in church and swore he would never set foot in such a place again and never will, but who watches the world in wonder and awe anyway. Him, too: “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of God.”

I can’t wait to get on the road again.

"Woman," he said, "why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?"
      Thinking he was the gardener, she said, "Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him."

¹⁶Jesus said to her, "Mary."
      She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, "Rabboni!" (which means Teacher).

¹⁷Jesus said, "Do not hold on to me, for I have not yet returned to the Father. Go instead to my brothers and tell them, ‘I am returning to my Father and your Father, to my God and your God.’ "

¹⁸Mary Magdalene went to the disciples with the news: "I have seen the Lord!" And she told them that he had said these things to her.

Lectio (taking a bite):What I said yesterday about the gardener..

What is the deal with translating Rabboni? Why use it instead of Teacher in the first place?

“Do not hold onto me..” Hmmm..

Meditatio (chewing on the story): There are a number of smaller mysteries within this larger Mystery of the resurrection, and I (and probably others) default to immediately trying to decode or solve those mysteries. I’m wanting to go to specific reference books and commentaries. But, while those references could tell me cultural information that might prove relevant to much scripture, it probably would not help much here.

John was writing down a story that had also been been told by many others. In this story for instance, he is reliant on Mary, or someone who knew Mary’s story, for information. Stories get told, and are heard, but not laboriously studied. They rejected or accepted and when they are accepted it with all of the accompanying incongruities, inconsistencies, and illogicalities.

We are used to arguments- where one side or the other “wins.” The whole “industry” of scriptural apologetics speaks to this human proclivity. Whoever piles on the most “facts” “wins.”

If we are to follow Jesus, then I (for one) am willing to follow both Jesus or the gardener in whom the spirit of Jesus dwells. I am willing to follow Mary in whom the spirit of Jesus dwells. Initially, the gardener will look like a gardener and  Mary will look like Mary, but when the speak my name I will hear it  way that they are sharing a voice with another.

Oratio (savoring the essence): The essence of these few paragraphs- the part of this scripture which “tastes” best, is the spicy, intriguing weirdness of it. I love that Jesus Christ has become Gardener Christ and Mary Christ (Ok, yesterday I opened a door of wild speculation which I am comfortable enough with today that I am keeping it open.) These are the first two pieces in the complex body of Christ which now has existed through time and geographical space.

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): Jesus was the word made flesh. So also became the gardener and Mary- because of Jesus! So I have also become, because of Jesus and the gardener and Mary and, and, and, and, and, millions of others. We are the Body of Christ. And, I daresay, that Body also includes people who don’t know Jesus’ name.

*‘ ‘The Risen Christ with the Two Marys in the Garden Of Joseph of Aramathea’, lliam Holman Hunt (1827-1910) . This is NOT a favorite painting of mine, however it does demonstrate the desire that so many have to somehow express this story- this story that defies logical thinking. Artists are sometimes best prepared to do this.

~~~

Even not-so-good artists try to do this.

~~~

and here’s one of my least favorite Easter songs in a very odd presentation..

10.Then the disciples went back to their homes, ¹¹but Mary stood outside the tomb crying. As she wept, she bent over to look into the tomb ¹²and saw two angels in white, seated where Jesus’ body had been, one at the head and the other at the foot.

¹³They asked her, "Woman, why are you crying?"

   "They have taken my Lord away," she said, "and I don’t know where they have put him." ¹⁴At this, she turned around and saw Jesus standing there, but she did not realize that it was Jesus.

Lectio (taking a bite): I become very focused of late on how the original writing was done: did the author (named John) do interviews? was he there watching over everybodys’ shoulders? was it automatic writing (as the spiritualists call it)?

How, in the final analysis, did Mary know she’s seen angels? and isn’t verse 14 surely one of the oddest sentences, in both content and structure? (The sentence does lend credibility to the possibility that John did interviews in building this gospel.)

Meditatio (chewing on the story): It’s fascinating that the disciples went back to their homes. Wouldn’t this place where the body is missing be the place to be? Yes, unless the disciples were still frightened- still waiting for the raid on their compound to take place- still afraid that Jesus’ fate was a preview of their own. If that is so, Mary’s continuing presence is all the more powerful. Her focus is not on her Self; it is on the Christ (although she is still looking for Jesus). She has decreased, while Christ has increased (John the Baptist’s prophetic words).

Oratio (savoring the essence): Mary really expected to see the Jesus she had known so well. She had played him over and over in her mind. Even in death, she knew what he would look like. Of course, she did not expect to see him as he had been alive, at all. So when she saw the person formerly known as Jesus, now the Christ, she didn’t recognize him. There is a theory that says we cannot perceive what we don’t have the imagination or experience to perceive; I don’t remember the name of that theory, but it seems (possibly) to apply here. It would have been, in other words, impossible for Mary to see anything but the resuscitated body of Jesus. It would have been impossible for her to see the resurrected person of Christ. (and since we’re asking hard questions here- would Jesus at this point have been naked, and- if not- whose clothes would he have been wearing? If he was wearing clothes from the lawn service company, then no wonder she didn’t recognize him!

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): Remember Matthew 25- “I was hungry and you fed me”? I’m wondering if Mary didn’t actually see both the gardener and and Jesus at the same time? And not as two people but as one person: the gardener blasted by the resurrected presence of the Christ. The gardener as a new creature (behold!). The gardener- the first to come near the resurrected Christ and subsequently be seen by God as God sees God’s son himself. (Which is what Paul said was happening to all these ‘new creatures’ running around!)

Bear with me here, and I know this is thinking that is about as far into left field as it can possibly be, and I don’t think I’ve ever run across this explanation before. But, here’s where sacred reading today has brought me: not into someone else’s answers, but deeper into the Mystery which is God. I’m farther down the formerly untrod portion of the path behind the Christ. Along with the gardener who is now seen as Jesus by the Father, and Mary who is now seen by the Father as Jesus. And along with you, too

 **

**artist’s card by obsessive creative flickr.com/photos/34954438@N08/3357299662/

*

¹ Early on Sunday morning,while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb and found that the stone had been rolled away from the entrance. ² She ran and found Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved. She said, “They have taken the Lord’s body out of the tomb, and we don’t know where they have put him!” ³ Peter and the other disciple started out for the tomb. ⁴ They were both running, but the other disciple outran Peter and reached the tomb first. ⁵ He stooped and looked in and saw the linen wrappings lying there, but he didn’t go in. ⁶ Then Simon Peter arrived and went inside. He also noticed the linen wrappings lying there, ⁷ while the cloth that had covered Jesus’ head was folded up and lying apart from the other wrappings. ⁸ Then the disciple who had reached the tomb first also went in, and he saw and believed—

Lectio (taking a bite):coming, finding, running, stooping, seeing, believing..lots of action here. Quick movements. Bursts of action.

I’m always a bit amused by the cloth involved here- the linens just lying there, but the head wrapping set apart and folded. Who’s doing the folding? And why is the “not going in” then the “going in” important for John to point out? Is this because he is a craftsman with the story- because he is no mere reporter?

Meditatio (chewing on the story): This piece leaves me out of breath with all the quick moving around. I think that is a mark of John’s skill. John is moving us, physically and emotionally with these words. From Mary’s confusion and excitement to Peter’s newfound bravado and curiosity, John is throwing his readers back and forth in this scene. It’s messy and invigorating, confusing and revealing, noisy and quiet. A pile of linen strips, and a neatly folded burial cloth.

Oratio (savoring the essence): It’s confusing and reassuring. It’s all of those things mentioned above  and it makes no sense while it is, at the same time, calming. Word made flesh made word and where does Word stop and flesh begin and that it the point here. It’s not about Jesus now Christ only; it is also about Mary now Christ, and Peter now Christ, and John now Christ, and the reader………..(I realize that all I’ve just written is outside the boundaries of logic and narrow Western definitions. But look at the story we’re dealing with! It is an explosion of contradictions and ideas that are so far outside bounds of normalcy that my Aha! thoughts pale like folded linens against these colors with no names and the off-the-scale music of this music of the spheres!)

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): The stories of Jesus are not written in the black and white of either/or. They were spoken- first- in the language of human exhultation, then written down in the poetry of profundity. Yes, John would say, this is exactly how it happened; this is exactly how I remember it! And I can/must try to read it with John’s eyes from inside of John’s heart.

* “Peter and John running to the tomb of Christ”, by Eugene Burnand (1850 – 1921)

⁹As the Father has loved me, so have I loved you. Now remain in my love. ¹⁰If you obey my commands, you will remain in my love, just as I have obeyed my Father’s commands and remain in his love. ¹¹I have told you this so that my joy may be in you and that your joy may be complete.

Lectio (taking a bite):love, love, love, love, love: one of the easiest words about Jesus to say; I think if the word got acted on 1% of the times it gets spoken, we’d be a pretty cool planet. Jesus obeyed his father’s commands (he says), and asks to obey his commands. And they are: Love God and love your neighbor. Not love God then your neighbor, but God and neighbor: simultaneously.

Meditatio (chewing on the story): Now, since I can’t see touch hear taste or smell God (despite what others may be pretending about their own sensory abilities) then perhaps- perhaps?- to love God is to love one’s neighbor? One and the same, maybe? Absolutely it is easier to stand in front of the altar or jump around in front of the altar and shout “I love God!” But- watch Jesus: there he goes again toward more lepers, and toward that mob with the rocks, and toward that slobbering demoniac, and near and sitting down with those damn tax collectors! Harumphh! You’d never catch me acting that…oh wait. Uh-oh. Maybe that’s how Jesus loved his father, who he couldn’t see touch hear taste or smell, either. (Yikes..)

Oratio (savoring the essence): Jesus told his disciples this so that HIS joy would be in them.When he is able to share himself, he is joyful.To be full of himself would have been , for Jesus, painful in some ways. For Jesus to have stroked, coddled, fussed over himSelf would have been the antithesis of who he was. What he was revealing, was the life of a person whose chains of Self had been loosened, destroyed. Love, therefore, is the giving away of one’s Self. The reward for sharing love (that kind of love) is Joy.

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): Err on the side of giving away too much. The pain will be short-lived. Right now, therefore, I go to look for more books for the Relay Book Sale. I’ve passed many by thinking, “Maybe I’ll need that..” Nonsense. I’m defining myself by my STUFF when I do that. My STUFF is all mixed into the definition of my SELF, and it’s a mess that needs cleaned up, beginning immediately. (I’m not even taking the time here now to find something cute to end this with) Bye..

addendum- 5 hours later: I packed 4 boxes with about 80 books. I closed my eyes and the false longings of my heart (ha!) against some of them. If I don’t move them out, they will follow me for another 20 years, or be a decision for my survivors, whichever comes first. This way, a lot of them will get turned into $ for the church’s Relay for Life team. And the rest will begin new lives in someone else’s garage.

^{(I’ve heard too many people- and I happen to agree with them- say that the 23rd Psalm is best heard in King James English. Thus, we intentionally use another translation here. Lectio should never be a mere comfort food!)}

¹ The Lord is my shepherd;
      I have all that I need.
² He lets me rest in green meadows;
      he leads me beside peaceful streams.
³ He renews my strength.
   He guides me along right paths,
      bringing honor to his name.
⁴ Even when I walk
      through the darkest valley,^[a]
   I will not be afraid,
      for you are close beside me.
   Your rod and your staff
      protect and comfort me.
⁵ You prepare a feast for me
      in the presence of my enemies.
   You honor me by anointing my head with oil.
      My cup overflows with blessings.
⁶ Surely your goodness and unfailing love will pursue me
      all the days of my life,
   and I will live in the house of the Lord
      forever.

Lectio (taking a bite): Familiarity breeds contempt? It is hard to separate this Psalm from every funeral of the past 10 years. I tell the story of shepherd boy David in flight from Saul and David’s real, or even false (so what?) bravado in the face of his possible capture, as a prelude to the Psalm’s reading, and that story too is in the way of a new reading. The shepherd is naming his shepherd.

Meditatio (chewing on the story): I don’t want to make everything sound like Step One of the 12 Steps, but I see something here I’ve not seen before. The shepherd IS naming shepherd. David is not king of the hill here like he is within his family or among the sheep. He is being hunted, he is being hated, and he is in hiding. He is vulnerable and he says so out loud:“The Lord is my shepherd.”

Oratio (savoring the essence): Based on what has happened so far, David’s confession of his weakness becomes a prayer for what he needs. And, he says, he will be needing exactly what it is he has at any given time. He is not banking on what he thinks he will need. He is depending only on what he will have, whatever that is (or isn’t). “I have all that I need,” he says: grass to rest in (maybe eat, too), water, and energy.

“I will not be afraid,” he adds, treating his need for courage just as he treated his need for water: it will be enough.

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): Here is an attitude of acceptance being formed at an early age. David is not panicking; he is accepting the moments he is in. He’s embracing his hunger, thirst, and exhaustion and saying (in effect) that even in these things I am alive and well and able to continue. He does not wish, regret, or act anxiously. He accepts that he will be well as he is well. He is already practicing his practice of contemplation and acceptance. He has already slipped down from the top arc of the wheel of suffering. Surely, goodness and God’s unfailing love will follow me he says. They will be enough then as they are now and as they have been.

The shepherd boy David has already entered the House in which he will live forever.

*

*by Bridget Kerr at artjournalcaravan.blogspot.com/

*

⁹ I took you from the ends of the earth,
       from its farthest corners I called you.
       I said, ‘You are my servant’;
       I have chosen you and have not rejected you.

¹⁰ So do not fear, for I am with you;
       do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
       I will strengthen you and help you;
       I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Lectio (taking a bite):I= God talking. You=people of Israel (plural). These are promises, assurances being made to Israel- words that would have been passed from person to person, group to group in difficult circumstances. They were reminders of a perceived “specialness.”

The “farthest corners” and “ends of” the earth would have been the known ones- largely the area around the Mediterranean and possibly some points to the east and southeast of Israel too. Certainly one could have met people from all of those areas in the marketplace on a typical Jerusalem day.

Meditatio (chewing on the story): “Why am I here?” is one of the most basic of human questions. The search for meaning and purpose is partially answered quite well when one concludes that “God’s calling” is the answer.

Oratio (savoring the essence): These are words of assurance to a nation which has been decimated (or is about to be). They are words of hope and promise spoken by the prophet on behalf of God.  People (all of us) need to be able to discern meaning and purpose. The greatest meaning and purpose is the double-edged sword of acceptance & justice. We must accept the context of the “calling” we have heard; i.e., we are finite, temporal, fragile. But we must also attune ourselves to the divine, renewing Creation. We work within the framework of God’s justice and God’s love when we work altruistically for other Life. By both guarding the Life that is, and helping to improve Life that could be better, we are doing justice.

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): I am called (we all are) within the context and wholeness of what we understand God to be. Logos, Word, the Word Made Flesh- whatever name or attributes we describe, we are diminishing God by leaving out other names and attributes. But we can know that we are “within” a reality that both defines us and gives us creative opportunity. In our acceptance of that reality, and in our actual doing of justice, we can know that we have heard the Great Calling.

****

Now, speaking of acceptance..

* artist’s card from www.rubbernature.com

I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you..

Lectio (taking a bite): that old and crazy prophet, that eschatological  expositor, Ezekiel! Ezekiel makes literal reading of his part of The Book impossible..he is a poet! He’s a crazy poet but he takes metaphors and sets them on fire! If he’d had an airplane he would have sky-written his prophecies!

Meditatio (chewing on the story): It is about  transformation, from stone to flesh. It is transformation in its most definitive form- from hard to soft, from dead to alive, from cold to warm. These are Jesus words spoken long long before Jesus. This is the prophetic tradition from which Jesus would emerge 300(?) years later.

Oratio (savoring the essence): Stones can be used as natural weapons. Flesh and mind and soul and spirit must work together to become a weapon. It is obvious that the prophet here was speaking about taking the weapon out of the human, taking the cold hardness of disregard for others and all of Creation, and replacing it with a warm and embracing love for the world about which the transplanter of hearts had once said, “That’s good.” This is a Valentine of a verse, a love note passed from the Lover to the Desired One.

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): This is a verse to be reminded of with every beat of my heart.

A mantra:

(breathe out slowly) I will remove from you your heart of stone..

(breathe in deeply) I will give you a heart of flesh.

(pause) And I will put my Spirit in you..

Repeat, all day.

Amen.

And, we close tonight with a band that’s really been setting all kinds of records across the Atlantic..please help me welcome an up-and-coming group, the Rolling Stones, singing “Heart of Stone”..

*

¹ Unless the LORD builds the house,
       its builders labor in vain.
       Unless the LORD watches over the city,
       the watchmen stand guard in vain.

² In vain you rise early
       and stay up late,
       toiling for food to eat—
       for he grants sleep to those he loves.

Lectio (taking a bite):Literally, the words would make no sense. Therefore, they MUST be seen as poetry, as Metaphors for something else. What else?

Is this a warning to merely dedicate the house or the city to the Lord, or to invite the Lord to have some hand in the process, and what hand would that be? It is so easy for some to talk literally without having any idea about the meaning of the words themselves, beyond the fact that they sound “holy.”

Meditatio (chewing on the story): We know the Lord is not going to build the house physically, so what does it mean to build the house (or guard the city) spiritually? V.2 seems to be aimed at those who would do either activity outside of the Lord’s purview and are, thus, wasting their time. God gives sleep only to God’s beloved..is that what it says? Or, is it that among God’s beloved are those persons who sleep well? Either way, it would seem- on the surface- that if you don’t sleep well, then you are not beloved. Wait! It is anxious toil that prevents sleep! The anxious, worried doing of anything is outside of God’s plans..maybe.

Oratio (savoring the essence): I think that’s it: doing anything anxiously is to be doing that thing without the Lord’s presence or assurance. Build a house quickly on the sand, cutting corners wherever possible, anxious to please others who will be visiting..that’s anxious toil, outside of God’s building plans. Stack military and paramilitary guards ,into a city that has no regard for the “Lord’s ways”, to guard it and a kind of peace will be present, but it will be an ungodly peace, based on fear. And fear affects everyone. Sooner or later, the guards will succumb to it, too, and there will be no guarding of the city.

(Think of beautiful, big homes built on forested hillsides in California where laws of physics, geology, and meteorology come together with some regularity to destroy homes. They were built where they shouldn’t have been because they were convenient to a particular city or to a specific ego-stroking neighborhood. The Lord (nor the Lord’s basic laws of natural science) were not brought in to these building plans.

Contemplatio (digesting the word and allowing it to nurture the body): Be still and know that I am God and think this thing through. One doesn’t have to believe God will miraculously provide blue prints in a dream. One only has to pay attention to the basic God-stuff of Creation already in place.

Do that, and you’ll sleep much better than those persons who are are worried about all the shortcuts they’ve taken, all the lies they have spoken, and all the easy, quick decisions thy’ve made.

* “typographic meditation” by www.analogueboy.org.uk